Books Read, 2008

My friend Charles Gramlich of Razored Zen for many years has kept a list of books he's read. I wish I'd done the same thing, but better late than never. I managed to keep a list of all the books I read in 2008. Encouraged by the reading lists posted by Lisa Kenney of Eudaimonia and Tim Hallinan of The Blog Cabin, I decided to post mine here.

I averaged a little more than one per week, fewer than in any year since I can remember. I find it harder to concentrate on books nowadays--I start far more than I finish. Often they just don't pull me into the story; I set them down, meaning to continue, but end up starting another book instead.

When I put a book on the side, I usually plan to return to it eventually. Only rarely do I start one and know I'll never finish it. When that happens I give the book to a friend or donate it to charity--even if I don't like it, someone else may. (Maybe I should start keeping a list of books I've started but haven't yet finished.)

I have several books on the list that were re-reads--books by some of my favorite authors, "comfort reads." Many of the re-reads last year were novels by Georgette Heyer, one of my all-time favorite authors, who died in 1972. Most of her books have long been out of print in the U.S., but are now being reprinted by Sourcebooks in beautiful trade paperbook editions. I purchase them as they're released, and enjoy the pleasure of rereading her wonderful stories.

My favorite of the new reads last year was The Brass Verdict by Michael Connolly, second in his new Mickey Haller series. Excellent, excellent. He's become one of my favorite writers.

Sphinx Ink’s List of Books Read in 2008
Legend: F = fiction; NF = nonfiction; R = re-read; A = audio book

TITLE, AUTHOR, DATE READ (NOTES)
1. My Sweet Folly, Laura Kinsale, 1/19/08 (F; R)
2. White Night, Jim Butcher, 2/18/08 (F)
3. Psychic Eye, Victoria Laurie, 2/24/08 (F)
4. Glass Houses, Rachel Caine, 2/24/08 (F)
5. The Overlook, Michael Connelly, 3/1/08 (F)
6. Seize the Fire, Laura Kinsale, 3/8/08 (F; R)
7. On the Prowl, Anthology (Briggs, Wilks, Chance, Sunny), 3/21/08 (F)
8. High Profile, Robert B. Parker, 3/23/08 (F)
9. What the Dead Know, Laura Lippman, 3/29/08 (F)
10. Blink, Malcolm Gladwell, 3/31/08 (NF; A)
11. Wildfire, Nelson DeMille, 4/2/08 (NF; A)
12. Irresistible, Mary Balogh, 4/17/08 (F; R)
13. Never Lie to a Lady, Liz Carlyle, 4/14/08 (F)
14. A Lady’s Secret, Jo Beverley, 4/19/08 (F)
16. Mystic Horseman, Kathleen Eagle, 4/23/08 (F)
17. Staying Dead, Laurie Ann Gilman, 4/28/08 (F)
18. Jumper, Steven Gould, 4/28/08 (F)
19. The Novice’s Tale, Margaret Frazer, 5/9/08 (F)
20. From Dead to Worse, Charlaine Harris, 5/11/08 (F)
21. Bones, Jan Burke, 5/13/08 (F)
22. Dagger-Star, Elizabeth Vaughan, 5/15/08 (F)
23. Hour Game, David Baldacci, 6/7/08 (F)
24. The Tomb, F. Paul Wilson, 5/18/08 (F)
25. Dead to Me, Anton Strout, 6/15/08 (F)
26. False Colours, Georgette Heyer, 6/15/08 (F; R)
27. Spare Change, Robert B. Parker, 6/16/08 (F)
28. Goodnight, Irene, Jan Burke, 6/19/08 (F)
29. Your Scandalous Ways, Loretta Chase, 6/21/08 (F)
30. The Cotton Queen, Pamela Morsi, 6/22/08 (F)
31. Forty Words for Sorrow, Giles Blunt, 7/1/08 (F)
32. The Ideal Wife, Mary Balogh, 7/3/08 (F; R)
33. Winter Fire, Jo Beverley, 7/5/08 (F)
34. Death of a Stranger, Anne Perry, 7/7/08 (NF; A)
35. Sweet Dreams, Irene, Jan Burke, 7/10/08 (F)
36. A Nail Through the Heart, Timothy Hallinan, 7/13/08 (F)
37. Lady of Quality, Georgette Heyer, 7/15/08 (F; R)
38. Black Sheep, Georgette Heyer, 7/20/08 (F; R)
39. These Old Shades, Georgette Heyer, 7/23/08 (F; R)
40. The Sleeping Doll, Jeffery Deaver, 7/29/08 (F)
41. The Black Moth, Georgette Heyer, 8/1/08 (F; R)
42. Cry Wolf, Patricia Briggs, 8/6/08 (F)
43. Death in Bloodhound Red, Virginia Lanier, 8/14/08 (F)
44. Alone, Lisa Gardner, 8/18/08 (F)
45. Red Square, Martin Cruz Smith, 8/21/08 (F; R)
46. Stalin’s Ghost, Martin Cruz Smith, 8/22/08 (F)
47. Polar Star, Martin Cruz Smith, 8/26/08 (F)
48. All Mortal Flesh, Julia Spencer-Fleming, 8/29/08 (F)
49. The Man with the Golden Torc, Simon R. Green, 9/19/08 (F)
50. The Gallows Thief, Bernard Cornwell, 9/27/08 (F)
51. The Ruby in the Smoke, Philip Pullman, 10/2/08 (F)
52. Regency Buck, Georgette Heyer, 10/20/08 (F; R)
53. The Archangel Project, C.S. Harris, 10/20/08 (F)
54. The Butcher’s Boy, Thomas Perry, 10/23/08 (F)
55. Last Dance at Jitterbug Lounge, Pamela Morsi, 11/2/08 (F)
56. Faro’s Daughter, Georgette Heyer, 11/8/08 (F; R)
57. Once Upon a Christmas, Diane Farr, 11/11/08 (F)
58. From Dead to Worse, Charlaine Harris, 11/16/08 (F; R)
59. The Brass Verdict, Michael Connolly, 11/21/08 (F)
60. The First Quarry, Max Alan Collins, 12/1/08 (F)
61. The Outlaw Demon Wails, Kim Harrison, 12/6/08 (F)
62. The Shadow in the North, Philip Pullman, 12/7/08 (F)

For some reason Blogger isn't letting me imbed the links in the text, so here are the links to my friends' blogs:
Razored Zen -- http://charlesgramlich.blogspot.com/; Charles' booklist reference -- http://charlesgramlich.blogspot.com/2007/10/reading-and-referral.html
Eudaimonia -- http://eudaemoniaforall.blogspot.com/ (Lisa's past and current booklists are on her blog's sidebar)
The Blog Cabin -- http://www.timothyhallinan.com/blog/?cat=2

Darwin Awards Winners?

A friend emailed me the message below, captioned "2008 Darwin Awards." It's hilarious, so I'm sharing it with you. I double-checked it with the actual Darwin Awards website ("A chronicle of enterprising demises honoring those who improve the species...by accidentally removing themselves from it!"). The 2008 nominees listed didn't include any of these anecdotes. Perhaps they're from previous years...but the website has so many I didn't take the time to check them all.

So enjoy the stories, whether true or apocryphal, and visit the Darwin Awards website for more tales of unbelievable (and deadly) human idiocy.

"It's not the heat, it's the stupidity."
_____________________________________________

Subject: 2008 Darwin Awards

It's that time again...The Darwin Awards are finally out, the annual honor given to the persons who did the gene pool the biggest service by killing themselves in the most extraordinarily stupid ways.

Last year's winner was the fellow who was killed by a Coke machine which toppled over on top of him as he was attempting to tip a free soda out.

This year's winner was a real rocket scientist....HONEST!

Read on...And remember that each and every one of these is a TRUE STORY. The awards were bestowed this year by December 6th, 2008 because the panel of judges believed that no one else could do more stupid stuff than these morons did by that time in 2008.

* * * * * * * * * * *

And the nominees were:

Semifinalist #1

A young Canadian man, searching for a way of getting drunk cheaply, because he had no money with which to buy alcohol, mixed gasoline with milk. Not surprisingly, this concoction made him ill, and he rushed to vomit into the fireplace in his house. This resulting explosion and fire burned his house down, killing both him and his unfortunate sister.

Semifinalist #2

Three Brazilian men were flying in a light aircraft at low altitude when another plane approached. It appears that they decided to moon the occupants of the other plane, but lost control of their own aircraft and crashed. They were all found dead in the wreckage with their pants around their ankles (HARD to control light airplanes when everyone moves to one side).

Semifinalist #3

A 22-year-old Reston, VA man was found dead after he tried to use octopus straps to bungee jump off a 70-foot rail road trestle. Fairfax County police said Eric Barcia, a fast food worker, taped a bunch of these straps together, wrapped an end around one foot, anchored the other end to the trestle at Lake Accotink Park, jumped and hit the pavement. Warren Carmichael, a police spokesman, said investigators think Barcia was alone because his car was found nearby. 'The length of the cord that he had assembled was greater than the distance between the trestle and the ground,' Carmichael said. Police say the apparent cause of death was 'Major trauma.'

Semifinalist #4

A man in Alabama died from rattlesnake bites. It seems that he and a friend were playing a game of catch, using the rattlesnake as a ball. The friend -- no doubt a future Darwin Awards candidate -- was hospitalized.

Semifinalist #5

Employees in a medium-sized warehouse in west Texas noticed the smell of a gas leak. Sensibly, management evacuated the building extinguishing all potential sources of ignition; lights, power, etc.

After the building had been evacuated, two technicians from the gas company were dispatched. Upon entering the building, they found they had difficulty navigating in the dark. To their frustration, none of the lights worked. Witnesses later described the sight of one of the technicians reaching into his pocket and retrieving an object that resembled a cigarette lighter.

Upon operation of the lighter-like object, the gas in the warehouse exploded, sending pieces of it up to three miles away. Nothing was found of the technicians, but the lighter was virtually untouched by the explosion. The technician suspected of causing the blast had never been thought of as ''bright'' by his peers.

*** Now, to the winner of this year's Darwin Award ***

(awarded, as always, posthumously):

The Arizona Highway Patrol came upon a pile of smoldering metal embedded in the side of a cliff rising above the road at the apex of a curve. The wreckage resembled the site of an airplane crash, but it was a car. The type of car was unidentifiable at the scene. Police investigators finally pieced together the mystery. An amateur rocket scientist ... had somehow gotten hold of a JATO unit (Jet Assisted Take Off, actually a solid fuel rocket) that is used to give heavy military transport planes an extra 'push' for taking off from short airfields. He had driven his Chevy Impala out into the desert and found a long, straight stretch of road. He attached the JATO unit to the car, jumped in, got up some speed and fired off the JATO!

The facts as best as could be determined are that the operator of the 1967 Impala hit the JATO ignition at a distance of approximately 3..0 miles from the crash site. This was established by the scorched and melted asphalt at that location.

The JATO, if operating properly, would have reached maximum thrust within 5 seconds, causing the Chevy to reach speeds well in excess of 350 mph and continuing at full power for an additional 20-25 seconds.

The driver, and soon to be pilot, would have experienced G-forces usually reserved for dog fighting F-14 jocks under full afterburners, causing him to become irrelevant for the remainder of the event. However, the automobile remained on the straight highway for about 2.5 miles (15-20 seconds) before the driver applied and completely melted the brakes, blowing the tires and leaving thick rubber marks on the road surface, then becoming airborne for an additional 1.4 miles and impacting the cliff face at a height of 125 feet leaving a blackened crater 3 feet deep in the rock. Most of the driver's remains were not recoverable. However, small fragments of bone, teeth and hair were extracted from the crater, and fingernail and bone shards were removed from a piece of debris believed to be a portion of the steering wheel.

Epilogue: It has been calculated that this moron attained a ground speed of approximately 420-mph, though much of his voyage was not actually on the ground.

You couldn't make this stuff up, could you?

AND PEOPLE JUST LIKE THIS ARE ALL AROUND US TODAY - AND THEY BREED & VOTE, TOO.

Five Writing Strengths

A long time ago Shauna Roberts tagged me for a writing meme: to list five of my writing strengths. It would be easier to list five writing weaknesses, but I finally came up with these:

1. Excellent command of punctuation, spelling, and sentence structure, as well as large vocabulary.
2. Widely read in fiction, especially genre fiction, resulting in broad knowledge of literary conventions and reader expectations on which to draw for own writing.
3. Instinctive grasp of good writing style.
4. Good at analyzing facts and setting them out in readable fashion (a skill more useful in writing nonfiction than fiction.)
5. Ear for lyrical language.

Whew. I'm cringing. Too much training in self-deprecation, not enough in self-praise. Better post this before I change my mind and erase everything!

Alternative Olympic Sports

My last post noted that the IOC has added BMX racing to the Games this year. In an earlier comment Steve Malley had listed BMX as one of the sports on his list of fantasy Olympics games. His others are pole dancing and dodgeball.

I suggested the addition of pogo stick. Steve Malley immediately came up with a list of pogo stick events: "single pogo, team pogo, triple-bounce for height and again for distance, single-bounce the same way, perhaps even a sort of pogo-obstacle course!"

Lana Gramlich suggested bungee jumping....(Cool, but really scary to me--no heights, please!)

Shauna Roberts suggested cat herding--it "would require athletes with speed, balance, and agility." (Claw-proof uniforms, too...that probably would be the most challenging Game of all.)

Bzzzt! (Light bulb above head) Faithful readers, what are your ideas for alternative Olympic sports?

Hurricane Preparedness?

After posting a serious entry on Hurricane Katrina's aftereffects earlier this week (Katrina Tattoos), I'm going for the funnybone now.

A friend who lives on the Mississippi Gulf Coast sent me the following humorous e-mail. (Her hometown of Pascagoula was devastated by Katrina.)

This is a witty sendup of the many "hurricane preparedness" tip sheets distributed this time of year. It's going around the Internet via e-mail, with nothing to identify the original author, so I assume it's not subject to copyright protection and reprint it in its entirety.
_______________________________________________

Special Message from the Gulf Coast FEMA Office
Subject: Hurricane Preparedness 2008

To ex-Gulf Coastians, present Coastians, and future Coastians or those who know a Coastian: Hurricane season is upon us. It begins June 1 and ends November 30.

Any day now, you're going to turn on the TV and see a weather person pointing to some radar blob out in the Gulf of Mexico and making two basic meteorological points:

1. There is no need to panic.
2. We could all be killed.

Yes, hurricane season is an exciting time to be on the Gulf Coast. If you're new to the area, you're probably wondering what you need to do to prepare for the possibility that we'll get hit by "the big one."

Based on our experiences, we recommend that you follow this simple three-step hurricane preparedness plan:

STEP 1: Buy enough food and bottled water to last your family for at least three days.
STEP 2: Put these supplies into your car.
STEP 3: Drive to Nebraska and remain there until Thanksgiving.

Unfortunately, statistics show that most people will not follow this sensible plan. Most people will foolishly stay here on the Coast.

We'll start with one of the most important hurricane preparedness items:

HOMEOWNERS' INSURANCE

If you own a home, you must have hurricane insurance. Fortunately, this insurance is cheap and easy to get, as long as your home meets two basic requirements:

1. It is reasonably well-built, and
2. It is located in Nebraska.

Unfortunately, if your home is located on the Coast, or any other area that might actually be hit by a hurricane, most insurance companies would prefer not to sell you hurricane insurance, because then they might be required to pay YOU money, and that is certainly not why they got into the insurance business in the first place.

So you'll have to scrounge around for an insurance company, which will charge you an annual premium roughly equal to the replacement value of your house. At any moment, this company can drop you like used dental floss. Since Hurricane Katrina, I have had an estimated 27 different home-insurance companies. This week, I'm covered by the Bob and Big Stan Insurance Company, under a policy which states that, in addition to my premium, Bob and Big Stan are entitled, on demand, to my kidneys.

SHUTTERS

Your house should have hurricane shutters on all the windows, all the doors, and -- if it's a major hurricane -- all the toilets.

There are several types of shutters, with advantages and disadvantages:

• Plywood shutters: The advantage is that, because you make them yourself, they're cheap. The disadvantage is that, because you make them yourself, they will fall off.
• Sheet-metal shutters: The advantage is that these work well, once you get them all up. The disadvantage is that once you get them all up, your hands will be useless bleeding stumps, and it will be December.
• Roll-down shutters: The advantages are that they're very easy to use, and will definitely protect your house. The disadvantage is that you will have to sell your house to pay for them.

"HURRICANE-PROOF" WINDOWS

These are the newest wrinkle in hurricane protection: They look like ordinary windows, but they can withstand hurricane winds! You can be sure of this, because the salesman says so. He lives in Nebraska.

"HURRICANE PROOFING" YOUR PROPERTY

As the hurricane approaches,check your yard for movable objects like barbecue grills, planters, patio furniture, visiting relatives, etc. You should, as a precaution, throw these items into your swimming pool (if you don't have a swimming pool, you should have one built immediately). Otherwise, the hurricane winds will turn these objects into deadly missiles.

EVACUATION ROUTE

If you live in a low-lying area, you should have an evacuation route planned out. (To determine whether you live in a low-lying area, look at your driver's license; if it says Biloxi, Gulfport, Long Beach, Bay St. Louis, Gautier, Pascagoula, Waveland, etc.you live in a low-lying area.)

The purpose of having an evacuation route is to avoid being trapped in your home when a major storm hits. Instead, you will be trapped in a gigantic traffic jam several miles from your home, along with two hundred thousand other evacuees. So, as a bonus, you will not be lonely.

HURRICANE SUPPLIES

If you don't evacuate, you will need a mess of supplies. Do not buy them now! Gulf Coast tradition requires that you wait until the last possible minute, then go to the supermarket and get into vicious fights with strangers over who gets the last can of Spam.

In addition to food and water, you will need the following supplies:

• About 23 flashlights.
• At least $167 worth of batteries that, when the power goes out, turn out to be the wrong size for the flashlights.
• Bleach. (No, I don't know what the bleach is for. NOBODY knows what the bleach is for. It's tradition, so GET some!)
• A 55-gallon drum of underarm deodorant.
• A big knife that you can strap to your leg. (This will be useless in a hurricane, but it looks cool.)
• A large quantity of raw chicken, to placate the alligators. (Ask anybody who went through Katrina; after the hurricane, there WILL be irate alligators.)
• $35,000 in cash or diamonds so that, after the hurricane passes, you can buy a generator from a man with no discernible teeth.

Of course these are just basic precautions. As the hurricane draws near, it is vitally important that you keep abreast of the situation by turning on your television and watching TV reporters in rain slickers stand right next to the Gulf and tell you over and over how vitally important it is for everybody to stay away from the Gulf.

Good luck and remember: It's great living in paradise! Those of you who aren't here yet, you should come.

Really!
_______________________________________________

Once again, I can't take credit for this clever parody. Kudos to the Unknown Wit who composed it.

Six Unspectacular Quirks Meme

My friend Shauna Roberts has tagged me for a meme. Here are the rules:

• Link the person who tagged you.
• Mention the rules in your blog.
• Tell about six unspectacular quirks of yours.
• Tag six bloggers by linking them.
• Leave a comment on each of the tagged blogger's blogs letting them know they've been tagged.

1. I love animals, especially cats and dogs, and can't remember a time in my life when I didn't have pets. Currently, I have three dogs, three live-in cats, and two neighborhood cats who visit daily. One of my favorite websites is Cute Overload, which I visit every day just so I can be cheered up by viewing photos of cute animals. (The pic at left is from Cute Overload, in fact.)

2. I dislike talking on the phone. I put off making phone calls, especially business- or repair-related, for as long as possible, sometimes causing myself great problems because of my procrastination.

3. Speaking of which, I'm an inveterate procrastinator. This sometimes causes me serious difficulties (but we won't talk about that now). The procrastination also helps me produce my best work. It's amazing how being up against a deadline makes my brain kick into gear and start clicking away like a well-oiled machine. Even when I start projects well ahead of time, they stretch out to fill the time available--until, once again, I'm up against the deadline and have to complete everything in the next 24 hours.

4. I love to clip articles from magazines and newspapers. Sometimes it's self-help stuff or practical information, but a lot of times it's quirky oddball factoid stuff (like the article on the Velcro 5oth anniversary celebration I mentioned in my last blog entry). I have stacks of clippings stashed away in various places around my house (not, unfortunately, properly sorted or filed away).

5. I like alphabetizing things -- lists, books, canned goods, etc. I find it soothing. I've been known to start alphabetizing other people's books in their homes or offices--by author if fiction, by subject/title if nonfiction. Usually they're amused, but occasionally someone is irritated and I have to apologize and reshelve the books the way they were. Yes, I realize it must be OCD....

6. I despise brand-name snobbism. To be specific, I'm appalled that people want to wear clothing or other items with the designer's name marked on the outside, especially when it's splashed all over. I disdain those who feel they have to prove their affluence by buying/wearing/using clothing or other items for their brand names. Their whole purpose is to show off, which I find contemptible. ... It's okay to buy high-quality products--it's sensible to buy the best quality one can afford. But why show the world you lack a sense of self-worth by covering your body/home/etc. with these signs of insecurity? Why be a walking billboard for designers or manufacturers?


After reviewing what I've written, I realize I sound curmudgeonly--rescued only by my love of animals. Ah well, by this point in life I've earned the right to be a curmudgeon!

Oops, almost forgot I'm supposed to tag other people for this meme. Don't know that I can come up with six, since others already tagged some I would have chosen, but here goes:

1. C.S. Harris at Candy's Blog
   
2. Charles Gramlich at Razored Zen--oops, no good, I see Lisa already tagged him.
   
3. Steve Malley at Full Throttle and F**k It--oops, I see from the comments following his latest post that someone else already tagged him, too.
4. Timothy Hallinan
5. NOLA Notes
6. Pontchartrain Pete

(I won't be offended if the taggees decide not to participate--memes can be time-wasters as well as fun. But it's interesting to find out these things about one's acquaintances.)

More Book Awards & Nominees

More book award listings, via the Poisoned Pen eNews for May 1, 2008. I am fond of these lists, both to give me an idea of what's popular in various genres and also because the lists offer fodder for my reading appetite.


2008 AGATHA AWARDS

BEST NOVEL
Louise Penny, Fatal Grace (St Martin's)

BEST FIRST NOVEL
Hank Phillippi Ryan, Prime Time (Harlequin)

BEST NONFICTION
Jon Lellenberg, Daniel Stashower and Charles Foley, Arthur Conan Doyle: A Life in Letters (The Penguin Press)

BEST SHORT STORY
Donna Andrews, "A Rat's Tale," in Ellery Queen's Mystery Magazine (Sept/Oct 2007)

BEST JUVENILE
Sarah Masters Buckley, A Light in the Cellar (American Girl)



2008 EDGAR ALLAN POE AWARDS

BEST NOVEL
John Hart, Down River (St Martin's)

BEST FIRST NOVEL BY AN AMERICAN AUTHOR
Tana French, In the Woods (Viking)

BEST PAPERBACK ORIGINAL
Megan Abbott, Queenpin (Simon & Schuster)

BEST FACT CRIME
Vincent Bugliosi, Reclaiming History: The Assassination of President John F. Kennedy (W.W. Norton and Company)

BEST CRITICAL/BIOGRAPHICAL
Jon Lellenberg, Daniel Stashower and Charles Foley, Arthur Conan Doyle: A Life in Letters (The Penguin Press)

BEST SHORT STORY
Susan Straight, "The Golden Gopher" – Los Angeles Noir (Akashic), ed. by Denise Hamilton.



2008 ARTHUR ELLIS AWARD NOMINEES
From the Crime Writers of Canada

BEST NOVEL
Linwood Barclay, No Time for Goodbye (Bantam)
Terry Carroll, Snow Candy (Mercury Press)
Maureen Jennings, Journeyman to Grief (McClelland & Stewart)
Louise Penny, Cruellest Month (St Martin's)
Jon Redfern, Trumpets Sound No More (RendezVous Crime/Napoleon & Company)

BEST FIRST NOVEL
Claire Cameron, The Line Painter (HarperCollins)
Sean Chercover, Big City, Bad Blood (Harper)
Liam Durcan, Garcia's Heart (McClelland & Stewart)
Susan Parisi, Blood of Dreams (Penguin Australia)
Sharon Rowse, The Silk Train Murder (Carroll & Graf)
Marc Strange, Sucker Punch (Castle Street Mysteries/Dundurn)



2008 LAST LAUGH AWARD NOMINEES
The Last Laugh Award is for the best humorous crime novel published in the British Isles in 2007.

Declan Burke, The Big O (Harcourt)
Ruth Dudley Edwards, Murdering Americans (Poisoned Pen Press)
Chris Ewan, The Good Thief's Guide to Amsterdam (St. Martin's)
Allan Guthrie, Hard Man (Harcourt)
Deanna Raybourn, Silent in the Grave (Mira)
Mike Ripley, Angel's Share (Allison & Busby Ltd.)
LC. Tyler, The Herring Seller's Apprentice (MacMillan)
Donald Westlake, What's So Funny? (Grand Central)

Yipes...

Yipes, January 2008 is already past, and I posted only one blog entry in the entire month. Somehow time got away from me. I hope to make up for it in February.

Rather than focusing on a single topic today, I have a miscellany of comments.

It's now Carnival Time in New Orleans. Mardi Gras is extremely early this year--Tuesday, February 5. Because it's right in mid-winter, there's been a lot of rain and cold weather (well, cold for New Orleans--to us, anything under 60 degrees is cold). Already a number of parades were rained out. (Most of them were rescheduled to other days and nights, sometimes resulting in as many as four parades rolling one after the other.) Tonight (Friday, February 1) starts the really intense weekend that leads up to Fat Tuesday itself. Hotels are 90% full and will be 100% by Tuesday. Our favorite saying here is Laissez les bons temps rouler, that is, "Let the good times roll!"--not grammatically correct French, but idiomatic Cajun French.

I no longer go out to the parades myself; my physical problems preclude walking distances or standing for any length of time, both of which are necessary if you want to watch parades. Now I stay at home and watch it on TV. I'll spend Mardi Gras day at a friend's home, playing Trivial Pursuit and eating junk food. Maybe I'll wear a mask and wig to stay in the spirit of the day.

I posted in early December about my fractured wrist. The cast was removed three weeks ago and the fracture's healing nicely. I'm astonished by how much range of motion I lost simply by having it immobilized for five weeks. Unfortunately, it's my dominant hand, too. I'm taking occupational therapy sessions to regain full use of the wrist. I sit in my recliner chair at night, doing wrist exercises while reading and watching TV.

And here a segue: For most of my life I have spent little time watching TV, a residual of my childhood--when I became a bookworm to escape the constant battles between my brother and sister over which channel to watch on the family TV. I've gone through life oblivious to television programs that were cultural icons for others. Ever since Hurricane Katrina, however, I've found myself watching TV more and more, especially news programs and sitcoms. My TV time increased so much during the past year that I began scheduling my activities around my favorite programs.

I assume the TV addiction was a reaction to some extreme stress I underwent in 2007. Perhaps my brain needed rest.

As a result of the Hollywood writers' strike, however, my favorite shows went into rerun mode early, due to lack of scripts. After going months with having read very few books, a couple of months ago I started reading again. Since November I've averaged about a book a week--a low rate compared to my former reading pace, but an improvement over the preceding months. I've decided to start keeping a list of what I read this year, encouraged by the lists of my blog buddies Charles Gramlich, Tim Hallinan, and Lisa Kenney. I wish now I'd kept a list all my life--it would be cool to look back over the years and remember my past by what I was reading.

It would be hard to match the books-read list of Art Garfunkel, however, at least for sheer duration. He's been keeping his list for almost 40 years, beginning in June 1968. In that time he's read 1023 books, as The New Yorker recently reported in "Lists: The King of Reading," by Nick Paumgarten, January 28, 2008. The article says this works out to an average of 2.16 books per month. The article mentions some of the books on the list--most of them classics or "serious" literature (e.g., Foucault, Balzac, Heidegger, Spinoza, Hazlitt, Milton, Proust), with the occasional foray into popular literature or humor (e.g., Chesterton, Dan Brown). In general, however, Garfunkel says he doesn't read "fluff":

The list contains just—just—enough low- or middle-brow work to suggest sincerity. In the spring of 1996, between “Flaubert in Egypt” and “I, Claudius,” he took on “You’ll Never Make Love in This Town Again,” by Robin, Liza, Linda, and Tiffany. In February, 2004, he gave Dan Brown a go before returning to Flaubert and Aristophanes. He has read several books by the actress Carrie Fisher, one of Simon’s ex-wives, as well as “Simon and Garfunkel: The Definitive Biography” (in May, 1998, two years after it was published, and just before moving on to Plato and Locke).

“I avoid fluff,” Garfunkel explained last week, on the phone from a Marriott in Florida. “The stuff that men are always reading on planes: I don’t read that.” He also doesn’t read postmodern fiction—the Garfunkel Library contains no Pynchon or Barthelme. “I tried ‘Gravity’s Rainbow,’ and I thought it was fraudulent,” he said.

“I read for the reading pleasure, not for the gold star,” he went on.

IMO, Garfunkel shouldn't be called the King of Reading--2.16 books per month isn't much. Many people I know read more than that every week; I know of some people who read a book or more per day. Garfunkel may be King of Books-Read-List Keeping, however, to have faithfully maintained his list for four decades. If you'd like to see the entire list, it's on his website.