Monday, December 25, 2006

Your Peculiar Aristocratic Title

I am an Anglophile and have long enjoyed reading historical novels set in the United Kingdom. Despite my deeply-entrenched democratic beliefs, in my fantasies I wallow in the glories of the British aristocracy of yore. I have even learned the nomenclature of the various orders, as well as the protocol of addressing the holders of titles. Hence, I was delighted to discover that I can receive my very own title, bestowed by Lady Fortune the Absurd of Greater Internetshire:
My Peculiar Aristocratic Title is:
Reverend Lady Sphinx Ink the Implacable of Goosnargh Leering
Get your Peculiar Aristocratic Title

Delighted with being ennobled (although I would have liked to be higher in the hierarchy than a mere Reverend Lady...perhaps a Countess, Marchioness or Duchess, if not a Princess), I have proceeded to feed in the names of some of my writing friends, with these results:
Countess-Palatine Emily the Undulant of Mousehole by Sea
His Exalted Highness Duke Charles the Lachrymose of Leighton in the Bucket
Her Exalted Highness Duchess Laura the Saturnine of Nether Wombleshire
Sir Steven the Idle of London by the Bow
Reverend Countess Candice the Festive of Midhoop St Giggleswich

What a distinguished company! But my amour propre was injured as I realized
these friends, except for Sir Steven the Idle, now are of higher rank and take precedence over me. For example, I will be the last to go in for dinner (no doubt on Sir Steven's arm, as he too is of low rank).

Oh well. At least I no longer have to sit below the salt.


Charles Gramlich said...

Perhaps, Dear Reverend Lady Sphinx, I could introduce you to my good friend, Count Jack of Ripper. He is a bit of a cad, tis true. But all say he knows how to have a jolly good time with the ladies.

cs harris said...

Giggleswich? Giggle, giggle.