Wednesday, April 09, 2008

"The Long Slow Revenge of Inanimate Objects"

Tim Hallinan has a great post on his blog today, "Long Slow Revenge." It's hilarious, yet sobering. Haven't we all had days like this...or perhaps not quite as bad as his day was.

I spend a lot of time trying to fight my way through the piles of inanimate objects--especially books--I've surrounded myself with over the years. I never thought, 25 years ago, that my love for buying rather than borrowing books, and for keeping memorabilia, would come to overwhelm me. Because, of course, being a procrastinator, I've continually put off the all-important technique of organizing my collections. Every now and then a box full of whatevers falls off its stack and spills all over the place, and I must pick up, rearrange, reorganize, etc....yet it's never done.

My sympathies, Tim. May you wreak vengeance on those objects! Let us say unto them, "The mills of Tim grind slowly, yet they grind exceeding small...."


    THOUGH the mills of God grind slowly,
    Yet they grind exceeding small;
    Though with patience he stands waiting,
    With exactness grinds he all.
    Henry Wadsworth Longfellow


Lisa said...

I read Tim's post and thought it was hilarious too!

Despite my best intentions and periodic purging sessions, I find it very difficult to keep the "stuff" from accumulating and taking over.

This week is tough -- we're installing hardwood in the living room, entry way and hall so furniture and books and all kinds of stuff is stacked in places where it doesn't belong -- and yes, I stubbed a toe this morning.

Sidney said...

Wow, I can identify. I thought Library Thing was going to help me get things organized and it helped but I really only got one section of my office organized. Need to get back to that. The other day it took me an hour to find a book I wanted to look at. I knew I had it, just took me a while to figure out where I'd wedged it on my shelves.

Tim said...

I have only two missions in life at the moment:

1. To finish the book for which I've borrowed your first name.

2. To warn as many people as possible of the slow-motion war that's been declared on all living things by inanimate objects.

And have you noticed how many things we sharpen these days? Time to wake up and smell the coffee, and to be very careful while making it.

Charles Gramlich said...

Pretty good. But far from hilarious. It is too close to the truth. Be afraid, be very afraid.

Tim said...

Just reread your post and it strikes me that one very rarely hurts oneself with (or on)a book. As inanimate objects go, they're remarkably benign. Maybe it's because they're the most animate of animate objects, made of trees to hold imagination. I mean, I've tripped over one or two, but that was my fault. And as often as I get a papercut, which is about one-third as often as I draw breath, I've never gotten one from a book.

So maybe you don't need to worry so much, at least about the books.

Shauna Roberts said...

Funny! Thanks for posting the link. I have too many days like that myself.

Rae Ann Parker said...

Thanks for a funny post. It is hard for me to part with books also, unless I place them with a good home. :)

Steve Malley said...

Loved this!